![\"\"](\"https:\/\/slavecamlive.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/06\/file_0000000010a871f5950f8441c8c6c499-240x300.png\")
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I haven’t written in a few days, and I promised I would, so here goes. Where do I start? It’s been the most amazing week. I won’t say ever, because these last few weeks, this entire last month, have been amazing. I guess this entry will be a rambling mix of thoughts, much like last week’s.<\/p>\n
We watched movies together. We watched The Godfather<\/em>. I’ve never seen the movie before, and before you say anything, I tend to gravitate more toward fantasy movies. I love magic, elves, druids, Lord of the Rings<\/em>-style films, paranormal stories, and some biographies and historical pieces. I also love a good documentary, so The Godfather<\/em> wasn’t the kind of movie I would normally choose. I absolutely loved it.<\/p>\n We watched the movies remotely. The first night, we watched together while talking on Battle.net. The second night, we tried a program called Teleparty. It was pretty cool. We just need to learn the controls a little better. Let’s see what else happened over the last few days.<\/p>\n Well, I got the Lovense toy that I was told I needed, or was it that I should have one, or maybe it was, “We need to get you one.” Anyway, it arrived. I went off-camera to see if it would even work. I haven’t had anything there for a long time, and I was quite nervous.<\/p>\n What did I learn?<\/p>\n It works, however, not quite in the way one might think. It didn’t seem to provide much clitoral stimulation, which is something I need. In my entire life, I’ve never been able to orgasm without it. So, I found myself having to maneuver things around a bit. However, the point for me wasn’t so much about reaching orgasm as it was learning how to use it and making sure I didn’t experience any pain. Women get older, their skin gets thinner, and if they don’t use it, they lose it. At least, that’s what my old gynecologist told me before she retired. So, I was pleased to discover that everything still seems to work. However, I’m not taking any chances. I’m still going back to the doctor to make sure everything is in order.<\/p>\n I also talked to some more friends this week, primarily an old best friend of mine from the SCL days. I sent her the story, and she had to take a break from reading it and come back to it later. I guess it made her cry a little. She was happy that we reconnected. She said, “You both have always loved each other. You don’t have the kind of relationship the two of you had and just forget about each other that easily.” It was so good talking with her last night. We reminisced about the old SCL days.<\/p>\n He has been a bit more Dominant with me this last week, and he has also been my best friend, simply hanging out and talking with me. I love both sides of him. He is my best friend, my love, my security, my safety, my counselor, and my confidant. He is all of those things wrapped into one extraordinary man. However, I also feel my entire body come alive when he takes control or speaks with authority.<\/p>\n “You’re mine.”<\/p>\n “I own you.”<\/p>\n “I always have.”<\/p>\n I belong to him.<\/p>\n Just typing those words sends little tingling sensations through me, like tiny electrical currents racing beneath my skin.<\/p>\n He said he did not want me not to romanticize this too much. I think what he really wants is for me to be open and honest about my feelings, whatever they are, just as I was on the old SCL site.<\/p>\n So, here goes.<\/p>\n I’ll admit, this makes me nervous. I know he will read this, and we’ve already talked about some of these feelings. But I promised that I would communicate honestly, even when it’s uncomfortable, and share what I’m truly feeling rather than what I think I should feel. I just don’t want to push him away,<\/p>\n So here goes…<\/p>\n California…<\/p>\n California never would have happened had it not been for what happened in Chicago. Perhaps California, Chicago, and the fact that I could never meet anyone after Master whom I truly wanted to be with are both the consequences of my choices and the punishments I have carried for what happened all those years ago in Chicago.<\/p>\n Anyway, I have so many emotions swirling around inside me right now that I’m rambling all over the place.<\/p>\n So, I think I’ll end this here for now.<\/p>\n Until next time,<\/p>\n Essence<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" I haven’t written in a few days, and I promised I would, so here goes. Where do I start? It’s been the most amazing week. I won’t say ever, because these last few weeks, this entire last month, have been amazing. 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